I’m writing this because of a post I just read from one of my favorite blogging buddies, Rick… He Bends Down.
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This is about death.
If you fear death like me, you might consider this idea.
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For a lot of years – ever since ‘the incident’ – I’ve been terrified of death. But a while ago I had a spiritual awakening. It was God stepping in to help me overcome this terror. He loves me and doesn’t want me to have so many fears. I have a lot of fears about things… about life in general…. many fears.
I mentioned ‘the incident’: an attack when I was 22. A brute of a man grabbed me off the street at knife-point at two in the morning. He dragged me into the woods, and as we went deeper and deeper into the woods I got more and more panicky. I began to think; “This guy is going to kill me! And he does not want anyone to find my body! “I am going to die out here in the woods; stabbed to death; and bleed out alone! My body will slowly disintegrate and the animals and insects will eat me. I am going to die alone… here… in the blackness of night.”
I would become a statistic: a missing person’s story in the paper:
“Girl Disappears Without a Trace Somewhere Between
New York City and Her Home in New Jersey”
My parents were not the average sort. When I didn’t come home until the next morning they never asked me where I was. So I didn’t tell them what happened. I’m sure they were thinking, when I didn’t come home all night; “What the heck is she doing now?!”
I searched for a solution in therapy, and PTSD-type therapy helped somewhat, so most of the time it is just a memory: something I lived through, the optimal word being – ‘lived’. But the thing is, I was left with a huge fear of dieing. I equated death with pitch-blackness and being alone.
That word… death… It sounds so… final.
The End….
kaputski….
eating dirt….
six feet under…
the End of life
As I heard growing up…“The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out, the worms crawl in and out your snout.”
But then, many years later, after I had become a Christian, something happened to me that I never will forget. I was at a friend’s house involved in a regular Bible study when God played for me a movie about death.
God’s movie revealed itself as an antidote to my terror – about when death happens. I will not be alone; and it won’t be pitch black. Friends and family will be waiting to greet me on the other side. I will be jumping into another world. In the movie, I saw billions and billions of people who were taking a quick, easy jump off this ‘cliff to another world’ ahead of me. And billions and billions of people who will be taking this quick, easy jump after me. It was just a quick, little jump that I will be taking it with billions of others. I will not be taking the tiny leap alone. Those who jumped before me will be waiting; with open arms they will be waiting – just for me! With smiles and in a great white light, they will be waiting. This calmed my fear immensely.
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**Peace & Feloreaw to our Loving Father**
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Really like your comments! I think God gives us grace when we are about to die. When it is our time, we will have this supernatural peace. When we are not ready to die, we don’t have God’s grace on us for death. Just a thought.
This makes a lot of sense to me. I hope this is the case.
I guess it wasn’t my time to die at that time because there was no grace there, only terror.
What a horrible experience Robin – I’m so glad God showed you the truth!
Yes, it was horrible, but God eventually used it for good. He got me PTSD therapy; it brought my alcoholism to a head quickly so that I was able to get & stay sober for the very young age of 25. And it led me to be open to other things as well.
He worked all things together for your good 🙂
This is something worth repeating over and over. Demons try to scare us with death, and successfully do so when we think only of our mortality. Jesus overcame the world and death, so why do we believe the devil instead of the Bible? There we go, being human again!
Peace
David,
I loved this comment you just made. It is very profound a thought. I must hang onto what the Bible and Jesus taught, and let the devil go by the wayside. Thank you for reminding me of that.
love,
robin
I love little encounters with the Lord like this. What you experienced is what those who walked away from Jesus changed also experienced. Now you know why they were changed in a few minutes. It doesn’t seem possible…and yet, it’s His specialty! (This is what happened in “Mini-Me and Me”). He is awesome, isn’t He?
My favorite verse on this topic says, “This mortality shall be swallowed up by life.” Now that gives me hope!
\o/
Yes Tami, I have been ‘changed’ in many many ways. I’m not AT ALL like the person I was 20 years ago… or even yesterday!
love you sister,
r
I am so sorry that this happened to you! What a horrible experience. And I think your reaction was perfectly normal and understandable. My last post on death was not my last post on death, if you know what I mean. There will be a followup, because Death never has the last word, as you have discovered, and as Jesus declared when he met Mary in the garden on what we now know as Easter morning.
Hi Rick,
You are by far, one of my favorite bloggers. You write soooo well. You get your points across well and easily. There’s just something about the way your write. I really enjoy you. Can you e-mail me the link to your other death posts?
robin
I plan on following up on my current post on death. No promises that a follow-up will be my next post but it’s likely.
thanks Rick for getting back to my about this.
robin