For most of my life I’ve been a deep introvert and didn’t have any friends. No friends! I grew up in a family of unfriendly, narcissistic people. No one came to visit our home. No parties – ever. My parents had huge distrust of the human race, and they taught all their children this philosophy. I learned that people will =Stab You In The Back= and =EAT YOU ALIVE!!= As I child I took them at their word. What a horrible thought, that someone could ever eat another person – alive! I mean it. As a small child, I was sure that other people would actually eat me while I was still alive!
I learned to stay away from them… as far away from them as I could get.
Life was a lonely experience for me. In fact, so lonely, that I eventually turned to booze for friendship, and became an alcoholic. Life is truly lonely when you have no friends, nor family, to trust. My parents tried to eat me alive themselves. I was emotional =meat= for them. I know that now as I look back.
But then I became a Christian. And God had great plans for me, though I didn’t know it when I first came to Him for help. One of His plans was getting me to turn into a ‘people-person’. I am actually becoming a people-person. WOW! The very idea!
This is how He changed me.
Before this, I saw people as two dimensional pictures on a wall. I saw only the flesh on their body’s. They were not really ‘real’ to me. They were things to be scared of, because they would =eat me alive=. But, through an experience I was given, with another young and vulnerable person, God showed me that other people were actually warm-blooded creatures, with hearts that beat in their chests…. just like mine did. With warm blood running through their veins. That they could get hurt… just like I could.
Slowly, ever so gently, He brought me to the realization that ALL PEOPLE have lived lives one second at a time…. just like I had. And, as a result of living all those millions of seconds, they had huge ‘stories’ to tell me… if I cared to listen to them.
I found myself starting to listen to the stories of the people that He put in front of me. All these stories! It didn’t take long before I got fascinated. All these walking, talking, two legged books around me. They were everywhere! I’ve always loved to read books. These were books – in voice form. Stories coming out of the mouths of other warm-blooded, fragile and easily hurt – people.
So I started to listen to people. And as I listened I attracted them. I found many of them began to be attracted to me. Many of them, I believe, had never had anyone who really cared enough to listen to their story. Now, I have to ‘fend them off with a stick’. Kidding. I never want to fend any of them off with a stick. I’m finding myself becoming in love with them… all of them; as I love all of the wonderful, powerful, stories they tell, about all the millions of seconds – of their lives.
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**Peace & All Feloreaw to our Great & Mighty God**
I hope I have communicated well enough what was given to me about this. If there are parts missing, or parts that don’t make sense, please ask Him about this. I know I am not a completed work yet, but I also know He will fill in any gaps in both our understandings – eventually – and in His perfect timing. What do you think? I’m open to any input about what has been revealed to you in this
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